Dust Off This Ol' Blog

Hey there .. yeah I know it has been quite a while.. no actually it has been a very long time since I updated this old blog of mine.. goddamn I dont know why it took me so long and I dont know why I have been so lazy.. haha maybe thats just me u know. but anyway I got tons of stories that I wanna share with u guys. okay then.. first things first.

1. My Studies

Okaaay so right now I am continuing my studies in UiTM Shah Alam as a degree student in Masscommunication. Yep the journey to get here was rough but hey I am still alive and I made it this far so its safe to say that I am holding on huhu.. after this I am gonna be end up doing practical at who knows where but I'll survive like always.. peace! 

2. My Vacation

well recently I have been going out with my friends just hanging out and doing crazy stuff.. normal stuff I mean. We hadnt got a lot of time to go out to some places for a vacation due to certain issues like money and time. But hey, anywhere is awesome as long as u got ur friends around right. InsyaAllah soon with ada nya rezeki we'll heading out there together raising hell hahaha..

3. My Life

My life? goddamn where do I start? haha there's just so much that has been going on with my life u know and some of it are not that good. Things with my family are not doing so well right now.. we've been facing some financial problems.. u know things to get done and bills to pay.. but we are trying our hardest to fix it though and what is important is that we keep our love strong and stick together no matter what. Ibu ayah kakak ammar, I love u guys! 

4. My Relationship

I just recently broke up.

believe me it is taking its toll on me. I have not been living well because of this.. some things that I cant even put it in words to describe some of my feelings right now.. but hey.. what the fuck.. I admit that it hurts til now.. where ever u are out there, I wish u the best of luck and goodluck with ur life.. but fucking shit man.. why does my love life always didnt end up well? How many times must I go through with this shit? Haihhhh life has a very weird sense of humour... I'll say bring it! 

5. Future Plans

To talk about my future plans, as usual I have to survive no matter what and plan ahead my life as it goes on. Or maybe just sit back and relax for now.. let the future me do the rest haha... I must say things has been quite interesting going on with my life.. some are bad and some are good.. we are all human, and we all made mistakes.. what counts is what we do after that, do we let it bring us down forever and do we get up and do something about it? U choose.. me? I fucking not let it get to me for long.. and who knows maybe I'll stumble into a pot of gold tomorrow? it wouldnt hurt to be a bit positive from time to time yeah? hehe and who knows also who I will meet next.. whoever is out there.. my future bride I mean.. and a girl of course! wait for me.. coz I just havent met u yet.. haha see ya guys next time.

Frustrated

Goddammit Jake!! Keep it together now! Why are you acting like a fool?? You used to be a lot better than this!! Arghh I don't know what's gotten into me recently but I've been feeling this sick fucking annoying and miserable pain inside my Heart for a long long long time now and I don't really know why..hmm well probably because I've been facing huge problems that I never had before in my entire Life all at Once and right now, it's killing me slowly!! 

C'mon Jake..cool down please..so before this, every time I got a problem I usually solved it very smoothly and calmly coz' that's just the way I am and that's just the way I handle things around but Until now..Life just hit me in the freaking Face..I'm literally Losing my mind but I still got some sanity left..that helps me to chill for a moment..

Who am I really am? Who am I? Who is the Real me really is? Questions questions in my mind right now..which I can't find the right answers..Why? I don't know..What's gotten into me?? I don't know..Am I really losing my touch??? I DON'T KNOW!!!!!!!!!! I just wanna kick somebody in the head and stomp it down couple of times til I'm fully satisfied..and I think I know who's the cause of all this..YOU. Yeah..You..

I hated you so bad right now and I think that you're one of the most Unappreciated person I ever met..and right now, I get to bear all the burdens that You CAUSED!! Don't you know how much I'm suffering right now? Don't think that I couldn't change back to the Old me again..Who is the Old me you ask? The Old me likes to beat people up and screwing things around and walk away like he just don't care about the consequences that will happen..yeah that's the old me..I'm a bad guy..I didn't like who I was before but right now I just don't care..its you who caused all this and some day you will pay for what you did to me..

The Holiday Conclusion

I'm not sure whether the title is right or wrong but it sure does sounds cool..Anyway, Assalamualaikum kawan2, today I'll be writing the conclusion of my extraordinary semester break holiday..

well, first of all since I got back home I found myself in a very moody mode because my X-Box 360 console was nowhere near to be found. It had been sent off to the gaming factory for some repairs and upgrades by my lil' brother..Oh well, at least I had my computer..to cut it short, I spent almost a month and a half living without playing my X-box 360..believe when I tell you that it sucks the hell out of me..I've been suffering out of boredom, u know..luckily I got my friends and families. Together we ventured on a wonderful journey through the holidays until' I didn't realize that my holiday was almost over..

First Activity: Menderu Waterfalls.

Sorry I couldn't get a better picture because it was raining and I'm just too lazy to snap pictures coz' I want to dive in the cool water and chill with my friends! Hahaha..But seriously, after a while as the rain starts pouring much heavier, It was starting to get much colder..but we kept on swimming around until one of us got out and head to shelter..It was freaking cold..but somehow quite enjoyable. So we got out of the water and dry ourselves and wait for the rain to stop and put out clothes on and went back home..The End.

Second Activity: Teluk Kalung Beach

Boy this one was a blast! We had a picnic over there and a little chicken barbeque for breakfast..but actually by the time we got there, it was already 12 O'clock in the afternoon so technically we had lunch just skip out breakfast..huhu but anyway, there I was watching my friends grilling the chicken and the others were enjoying themselves swimming at the beach..even I included. Haha I don't wanna miss the excitement so I decided to join them swimming..believe me that we had a blast! After the swim, all of us gathered and ate our lunch..I brought 10 Nasi Lemak bungkus for my friends and I so that we can ate it with the chicken that were just been grilled..It was stunningly delicious. So, after that we chill and had a little chat before we got up and pack ourselves and went back home..The End.

Third Activity: Fishing

This one took place at Pantai Marina near Kemaman..I didn't have any fishing set skills so I just sit at the back and took photos..haha it's quite fun just to watch my friends fishing but unfortunately we didn't caught enough fishes there so we decided to head to another fishing spot..

Now this is in Bukit Kuang where some of my friends lived there so it was very near..we sat there for almost 2 hours but again, luck was not on our side..we did not caught any fishes there..it was very disappointing but honestly I just don't care..I just like hanging out. Anyway, we eventually decided to bet on our last card which was to head straight to one of the most popular fishing spot around..

The Abandon Star Cruise Jety itself baby! There we saw a lot of people hanging around while fishing and we came to do the same also..we felt the cool breeze of the wind while chillin' out and it was fun..we also saw a group of fishes swimming nearby the jetty and the scenery was damn beautiful..the place was so calm and steady and it felt peace..Somehow, we were very unfortunately..for the third time we failed to catch any fishes that day..so we went back home in utterly depressed..but still, it was Fun.

Fourth Activity: Walimatul Urus

It was my cousin's wedding and we had this one prepared for like three straight days..Of course I helped them getting ready for all of this while taking some pictures as well..the wedding was so crowded and lots of happy folks around..it was hectic but harmony at the same time..nevertheless, the food was awesome! And I'm Glad to be part of the family to celebrate this wonderful occasion..

So there you have it guys..truth be told I had a lot of activities but I'm too lazy to post all of it..hehe so these 4 awesome activities will be just enough..My Holiday is fun..but I admit there are times that I regret living through some of the moments and somehow I wish I could turn back time to change it back to be perfect..but then again, nothing is perfect right..everyone makes mistakes and everyone lived through their lives eventually..the important thing is you forgive people..then you forget about the past mistakes..live life to the fullest as I should say..hehe Take Care people and may your holidays be Splendid also..

A Picture worth A Thousand Words.

Breaking The Rules

Dear Blog,

Over the past months, I broke one of the rules in life and now it's killing me slowly..let's just say that my Day light became my Night and my Night Time became my Day light..

I've been living this way for a long period now and I thought that it was cool..you know, cause' I thought I could use a little time for myself..it's peaceful and it clears my mind from any problem..then I got used to live like this till' now and believe me that it's taking it's toll..usually, I spent my time playing games and probably did some reading..other times, I just watched movies till' day light comes..last few weeks, when I got home from my campus, I was told that my game console was brought to repair in a shop and I could get it back two weeks from now..bugger..that still leaves me my computer so there's not much to worry about..but no..unfortunately, today my computer had broken down and causes a lot of problem which I can't used it at all..so I sent it to the workshop to get it fixed..damn..day by day without those two things, my life was simply hard to live for..I got bored of doing other things such as reading and watching movies..I have few friends over here in my hometown cause' most of them are still studying and won't be back here for a long time..

So what now? I'm losing my mind right now and I don't know what to do..I'm stuck here can't sleep at all in the night..when I tried to sleep early, eventually I'll be waking up again..my brain has already got used in sleeping in day light..it's hard for me to sleep at night again..Insomnia..that's something you won't wanna mess with..it kills you slowly..at one time, it got you thinking of things that you never thought you would be thinking of..sometimes about your life, relationship and families..

It's too late for me to turn back now..this is what I get by messing with Life's Rule.

My Plans..My Determination.

There's a lot of things that has been Disturbing my mind..first, Money..second, plans for the holidays and third is relationship..

It's been a long time that I keep this freaking feeling inside me..there's a lot I gotta say but I'm not really sure where to start..well, my semester break is up and I'm gonna be sitting at home doing nothing for two months.......or maybe not. I'd probably go somewhere to do something and make new experience for myself..but I don't know what it is..since the day I got home, I've been living in a world of boredom and I planned to go and look for a job but I guess that'll have to wait because I'm too lazy..actually I do have something that I must do in this holiday and I gotta finish it as soon as possible..the problem is, I'm a little short of money..I gotta buy something for a friend and I still don't know what it is yet..plus, my parents' anniversary is coming up too so I gotta buy them a present too..I got the car to drive, I got the will to buy but I don't have enough money to buy them something..and it's too late for me to find work now for money..I gotta think of something..oh well, I'll come up with a solution eventually..right now I'm just blurrr..

I hate when it comes to relationship's aftermath..well, I got this problem with a good friend of mine and we started fighting and arguing about a certain topic that I didn't expected to be discussing with..cause' I don't know about it at all til' she told me the real thing and it's easy to say that I became the victim in this tragedy and my friend here, well we've known each other for a very long time and we've been looking out for each other ever since till the day that we started fighting..my friend was very angry at me cause' I let this happen and did not realize that I was being used by someone..Am I that blur? I don't know..but yeah, I know that my friend was just worried about me and I can't blame her for being angry at me..I deserve it for my stupidity..

But never once I thought that we would lost contact from each other for a long period of time..and then I got very worried cause I really can't lose this relationship..I wanted to see her to make things right again but I haven't got the chance yet..So I wait and wait till this very day and hope that my friend would still open her heart and forgive my mistake..I plan on visiting her soon just to tell her this:

" I really don't know what's going on with you right now but I really wish I could know cause you're my friend..and I want you to be completely honest with me..tell me what am I to you? Am I important as I think I am to you? Cause' you're sure as hell are damn important to me. We've been through together a lot and we have come this far together..I can't imagine what my life would be If I didn't had met you at all in my life cause you have been helping me get through many things in life and I thank God I did met you..is this fate? Is this chance? Who knows but I believe it is..whatever it is I apologize to you for making you mad, my friend and if I can go back time, I would change it all back to be better and make you smile everyday..you don't what it's like to be me..to feel so blessed to know a friend like you..very few people experience and have this kind of relationship in life and I am very grateful that I am one of them..My friend, I have lost so many things in life..just promise me that I won't lose you too..so please..can we turn this back to normal again? Remember that I'll be there when you need me..you just gotta tell me so that I could know..don't keep your problems to yourself..share it with me and I'll do what I can to help you get through life just like you helped mine..just so you know that this is my confession to you."

Yours Sincerely, Amir

"You Meant The World To Me"

The Story of my Life | My Childhood

Finally..after everything that has been said and done..my feelings has lead me to update a story..a story that involves a lot of people..this is..this is the STORY OF MY LIFE.

Name: AMIR AIMAN BIN MOHD HASHIM HASNI BIN ABDUL MALEK BIN HUSSEIN

Nickname: JAKE BLUR

Siblings: 3 [one little brother, ME, one older sister]

So I grew up in Kemaman, Terengganu. But before that, I've been living my life overseas which was in Glasgow, Scotland and Paris, France until I was about 4 years old..then I came back here with my family and started a life at Terengganu. My closest friend at that time is my sister which we played toys together..we played runaround together and lots of other fun stuff..my little brother is just a baby. I was very close to my parents as well and I would sleep with them every night and at that time..I was a GOOD Kid..

My childhood is like every other kids in the town. I was a very naughty kid and I got scold by my mother like 24 hours straight..up until I was about 10 years old, I started living with my care-taker along side with my little brother because my parents are very busy teachers at that time and yeah my school started on the afternoon so they didn't have time to send me to school..so I took a van..at that moment, I met some new friends and they all are very bad kids..whenever I was in the van, I learn some bad things and I like it and yeah I was a dumb kid too..I learned some various harsh words and some various harsh doing and sticking your middle finger to other people..At that time, I was a BAD Kid..

My schooldays were very fun and exciting..because I was the 'Big Gangster in the block' at that time and I rode with my very own gang..possessing that much power, I abused it by beating up little kids and say bad things to my teachers and even trying to steal some food in the canteen, which I succeed everytime..I was living in an unhealthy way at that time til I met this one beautiful girl..she's a new girl which she got transferred from the other class and eventually be studying in the same class as me..the moment I saw her, she smiled at me then I melted..my heart became soft again and at that time..I was a GOOD Kid..

As years go by..my primary school days ended up kinda Okay..My gang got disband because of one girl..then I tried to steal her heart but eventually I failed so I moved on..at least, she got me to a new life yeah..when I was in standard 6, I started to focus more on my studies and I made it to the second-best class in that school..plus, I got 5A's on my UPSR examination and I felt so freaking happy! I made my parents proud and I made my friends proud too..in the end, I got too cocky with my results because I've been offered to study to an Elite school for my secondary school studies..so I took the offer and started living there in a hostel..this is my first time living without my parents guiding me so eventually I ended up being too free and too wild..I ignored my studies and always thinking about having fun..hmm at that time I was a BAD Kid..

The Story of my Life | Secondary School

Name: Amir Aiman Bin Mohd Hashim Hasni Bin Abdul Malek Bin Hussein

Nickname: JAKE BLUR

School: SRK Sultan Ismail | SMEK Mak Lagam | SMK Sultan Ismail II

I got into this elite school and it was currently famous at that time because the school was very new and very beautiful..when I was in there, the school does not even had enough students yet..but what the hell, we just continue our schooldays like usual..everyday is the same..in the morning we woke up early to go to the surau for subuh prayers and then getting all geared up for school..then on the afternoon, we would head back to the surau again for asar prayers and then went to our own dormitory which it contained 8 people per room..life is boring for me at that time so I would do something to keep away from being bored..and mostly something bad at that time..I stole some things from my friend's locker and also I build up another gang to take control of the hostel life..but eventually it didnt worked out that well as they are other people who got their own gang..so we fought each other sometimes and this continues on until I was in my early form 3 year..that tragic year was the worse..I caused many trouble and did some very bad things..til that one very day..I was playing 'breakdancing' with my friends at the hall and we were having so much fun until I decided to make a backflip just to show off my friends coz I did it before but this time..I failed and misplaced my landing and banged so hard on the floor that my left elbow broke..the pain was unbearable and I cried coz I couldn't stand it..I was took to a 'tukang urut' near my house by my parents and I was treated there..at that time, I realized that I was receiving a punishment from God for all my wrong doings over the past and believe me, the massage was painful..I can't remember how many times I screamed..at that time, I realized how bad I was.. at that time, I decided to change myself..at that time..I was a GOOD Kid..

As time goes by, it took me almost 2 months for me to finally recover from my broken elbow and up until now I still can't move my left arm efficiently and it became more weaker than my right arm which was very weird..after 2 months sitting at home..I returned back to school to start my studies again..and at that time, I don't know anything. I was dumb and when I got back to school, all the people looked at me as I was a has-been student in the school..but I ignored them..I manage to catch up my studies and managed to recuperate again my focus towards what's important in my life..I started to once again read the Quran and memorize the Surah yasin whenever I had the chance going to the surau..I eventually make new friends and this time, my friends are very good people..they are geniuses in studies and very loyal when it comes to friendship..It was like I was living in heaven on earth at that time..finally the day of my PMR examination begins..I was fully prepared to ace this but in the end I got only 4 A's and 4 B's..but it was okay..it was okay for my family..but my sister won the bet though..she got 8 A's for her PMR and that was a family record til this day..some of my friends got higher results but I was in the lowest mark rank students but I was quite satisfied with it..I handled it with a smile til one day before the school holidays began..I got into a fight again for the very last time at that time it was reported to the school warden..I didn't remember why it happened but I'm sure it was something stupid..and it got me into a mess after that..I was brought to the school principle and finally I got kicked out from the school! I can't believe it! but what can I do? I had to find another school..my parents were furious and so am I at that time..God knows what I had to go through..in the end, I got in to a school where it brings back my past childhood memories again..in the past, I knew a girl that her father was a good friend to my father..and I've been waiting to meet her but don't know when I got the chance..til that very moment..I got the opportunity to finally meet her..but before that, I came to this school with such anger and disappointment about myself..I think I just embraced the Hate and started living my life alone from anybody else..at that time..I was a BAD Kid..

It just blew up in my face

Holy crap..I don't know what to say..

-The End-

A word person..A true Power

By the look of the title says it all right..a word person..what do you know about word person?

For me, a word person is a person who can influence others to do what they wanted you to do..that depends on their intentions, whether it is a bad thing or a good thing..

Somehow, there's a side of me that I really wanted to be called 'A word person'..I don't know why but I really do..it's just that I have dreamed to achieve such skills like language skills for my own purpose of life..some for my business discussion and some for my relationship life..being a word person is very exciting..I just wish someday I could achieve such knowledge like that..til' then, I just have to keep studying and learning and practicing my language in my life..for the sake of my future and for the one that I cherished..

A word person..what more could you describe about it? I have a friend who possesses this power..and I envy him for that..still, I'm glad to have a friend like him so that I can learned one or two knowledge from him as well..In time, I'll be the one who possesses this amazing power too..my goal is to become a professional journalist or a successful columnist..I like writing and writing is what I will do in my life..I will never give up on my dream and soon I will achieve greatness..Believe is important..this is me, Jake Blur signing off for now..this is me, Jake Blur..The Cult of Personality..

"Those who can speak loudly are better than others who uses brute force to get what they wanted.." Benjamin Franklin

Words to Describe us...

Hey guys! Damn, It's been a long time since this blog's been updated again..it's not that I'm busy or anything..it's just that I'm too lazy to even think about writing a blog..but I told myself not to be lazy for long because if I want to be a successful Journalist someday, then I'll have to struggle hard and work my way up higher through time..and for that, I've got to shove 'lazy' away from my dictionary..so determination is the key for me to do it...I can conclude this paragraph by the word....

Determination.

You see fellas, it is my desire to achieve being a great journalist..a great word person and a great mind-thinker..It always have been..that's what I always put in my mind..that's what keeps me going..and I know by the moment I started studying Mass-Communication..I knew that I can't stop now and I've got to be a lot tougher than before so that means I've to change myself..So all of this I can conclude is about...

Desire.

"Dream and keep dreaming as if you'll live forever and live as if you'll die today". That famous quote has been stuck in my mind for a very long time because I like the way it sounds..and it's very true as well..we can't stop from dreaming ourselves to be better right? And we gotta appreciate every little thing in life as if there's no tomorrow..so from this we can also conclude the word....Appreciate.

Life is full of beauty..Notice the pretty flowers, the cute face of a child and the sweet smile of a woman..are just stunning..this just makes me wanna live my life to the fullest potential! And never back down from it..I have gotten this far and I'm sure as hell gonna move forward no matter what..Enjoy life along the way..when life knocks me down, I stop myself and relax for a while..shoving away the problems and just enjoying the little things that makes my life....

Beautiful.

So anyway, I've discovered that I always have choices and sometimes it's only a choice of attitude..No one else can ever make my choices for me..and that goes the same thing to you guys..your choices are yours alone..they are as much a part of you as every breath you will take, every moment of your life..So every time, I will keep in mind that Every choices that I make today, will determines how my Future would End up.. My last word that I concluded for today is.......

'TAKE-CHARGE'

That's it from me..Take care! Hope you guys enjoyed reading it..Once again from me, The Cult of Personality! Being The Voice of the Voiceless! Peace be upon you..

"It is our choices that show us who we truly are, which are far more than our capabilities.." Joanne Kathleen Rowling

Fashion Week, Fashion Heat

What's up guys, it's been a while since I updated my blog..a lot has happened by the way! Really like a lot..Controversy here and there..Conflict struck everywhere..and pure madness..Hahaha sounds crazy enough? Let's see what I've been doing over these past few months..Something that I never thought that I would get involved in..Something related to..........
FASHION.

Event: Fashion Display Assessment Day

Location: College Lobby Hall

So I got a job as a photographer for my friend who was a semester 6 student in Art & Design Course for his Fashion Display Assessment day at the College Lobby Hall..I snap pictures of him arrange his things at the lobby such as his Well-Designed dresses, his lovely portraits of models and lot's of other stuff..

Semester 6 students consists of only 2 students..yeah you heard me, only 2 which was my friend and his colleague, a girl. Both were great fashion designers with their own skills and styles..

Before the Assessment day, me and my friend here went to do a lot of things and this is the first time I've watched him worked very hard to get some things done..I admired him for that. In this part of business, I, myself had entitled to be the driver for him..Hahaha and it's actually kinda fun! Go here and there, buy some stuff and pick up a few people well mostly models of course for the Assessment day which was coming very soon..

In the end, that day had to come eventually and this took place at the Fashion Studio before it started..All I did was snapping some pictures of the models as they were getting ready and prepared for the Fashion Display later on because that's my only job after all..

After a few snaps here and there and as the models were finally ready, we head out to the Lobby Hall for the Fashion Display..Various Important people from the UiTM itself came to college to witness this fashion display so it's kinda big deal for my friend here..the event took about not more than an hour or so and after a few critics here and there it was finally over..Face of relieved can be seen from my friend and models..I just continued taking photos..

All of this may sounded like a very simple event..it may sounded like it's not very interesting..but try to wear my shoes for once and you may see that it is a one of a kind experience..I met a lot of new friends..very good friends too they are..and at the same time, there are a lot of conflict and problems that we faced in order to get through this..I learned that the Fashion World could be as challenging and hard as any other courses in this life has to offer and It's a very very very unique and creative world to be in..

Expedition: Hutan Lipur Berkelah

Location: Hutan Lipur Berkelah, Maran, Pahang

Date: 15 September - 16 September 2011

Crew: Jake, Fad, Danny, Anas, Nabil, Safuan, Afiq, Berd

Day 1:

Yeah baby!!! Recently, I went on an Expedition to Hutan Lipur Berkelah somewhere near Maran with my beloved and crazy housemates! All 8 of us got prepared in the afternoon and we started driving there at 3.00PM..the journey took about an hour and a half but it was a fun drive..

So we reached there on the evening but not too late..we started to realize that the weather was not quite pleasing as it started to rain..but no worries, it's not that heavy..we took a shelter under a cottage as my friend, Nabil lead out our prayers for our safety in this forest..

Hutan Lipur Berkelah is a rain-forest and it's filled with high hills and thick trees and also it has a stunning waterfall drop..while we were at the bottom, we noticed some few girls having fun at the river. But, we continued walking..we know that it's gonna be a long hike to the top so we wasted little time in stalling around..

The journey to the top hill is sooo tiring! But we had fun..we've enjoyed the view of the forest and watching nature doing it's job..it's just splendid..we had to climb up big rocks and hike on a steep hill..it was quite challenging yet, it was a very good exercise..some of us accidentally slipped a couple times while making our way to the top but that's normal and all is well..

Finally, we've reached our destination which is the camping site..It was spacious and it has an amazing view of the waterfall and the lower hill..by the time we reached there, the day is starting to get darker so we quickly set up our camp which included 3 tents and 1 canopy place for our campfire and foods..

Setting up the place is fun! It builds up my experience in survival..hahaha..so after finishing the last touch, we headed to the waterfall just to wash ourselves from the sweats and dirts that we had while reaching the camp site..and let me tell you that the water is freaking cold! Still, we bath in that water like it wasn't cold at all..the waterfall had a drop zone which was at the end of the river..it's very beautiful and I couldn't tell you how much I've enjoyed it!

Night came and we were at the campfire cooking some foods..which was Maggi..hehe..All 8 of us surrounded the fire just to warm ourselves..we ate our food in the cold as it was starting to rain heavily..it was not pleasant but we had to eat it either way because we were hungry as hell..

So it was dark..and it was raining..all of us were in our tent resting ourselves from all that hiking..I fell asleep right after I lay my head down..I woke up later at night and noticed that everyone is quite..they were sleeping..so I tried to fall asleep back but it was no good..then after a while, one of my friends woke up too and he wanted to go outside to enjoy the night time..

I got out of the tent too and saw that the night was bright because of the full moon and then 7 out of 8 of us got out and were just sitting down and look on the bright night sky..there are a lot stars and just by looking at them, I felt peace and calm..along with the cool breeze at night plus the sound of the waterfall making their way to the bottom was very soothing...the night continues on~

Day 2:

As morning reaches, all of us woke up because the sun was very bright and hot..half of us were preparing breakfast and the others went to the waterfall for some morning bath..and the water gets even more colder than yesterday! Damn! I jumped off a cliff to dive into the water and gosh it was an adrenalin rush! FUn FUn FUn~

So after having fun at the waterfall, all of us packed up our things to climb back down..the time was at 11AM and we wanted to reach the bottom before it gets even more hotter..we're settled and ready to climb back down..so yeah, the journey was again hard and tiring but awesome and amazing..as we walk out of the forest, we saw a couple of groups of people passing their way through the forest and to the top..

As we reached down, it took us about 26 minutes only..better than the last time! There were more people than yesterday also..so before leave, we rest first and have a few drinks to gain our energy back..then, all of us took one last photo and we're outta there~

It's sad to leave that place but still, we had the time of our lives..It was a day to remember for me and to all my friends also..this isn't the last time..we'll be back..

I have found peace..

Peace, I will find..

I wanna let u know that I'll be offline for a few days..as u can see that today I'll be going on a vacation with my friends and seniors which also are my housemates..we'll be going to Hutan Lipur Berkelah somewhere in between Gambang and Maran, Pahang..I don't know what that place looks like but people said that It's very beautiful..

I wanna go there to find peace..to get away from my miserable and lonely life..just to escape from all the problems that I've been facing, u know..and I hope I'll find some peace when I reach there..and what better way than to go there with my good friends..

Till' then..just assume that I'm dead for a few days..maybe for a few weeks..I wanna go out of this internet life..It sucks..and I want something different..who knows when I'll be online and updating my blog again yeah..before I leave, I bid you guys good day and live life with prosper and honesty..Appreciate the present as much as possible! and pray for me and my friends' safety at Sg.berkelah okay..thanks..

Assalamualaikum~

Map of True Places..

Hey there, World..How's it goin? Tonite got me thinking about something that is kinda out of the ordinary..and that is about a place where I hold dear the most..well, maybe that place is not that special for anyone..but at least it is for me and that's more than enough..

So how do we navigate our lives actually? People are born, people die, families break apart and new families are formed. Change happens from Gradually to then Suddenly. The answer, I think, lies in finding our own true places like safe havens that are home to us and make us feel like our better selves. Sometimes, these places, they exist only in memory and imagination. Almost always, they are connected with the people that we love..right?

The true place in my life is a real one..which is definitely in Kemaman, Terengganu..that place is where it all began and I promise you that I will never ever forget that place because it has so much memories..including the bad ones..When I'm back in Kemaman, I get to see my beloved family again and also get to spend time with my friends..even sometimes, go for a walk with the person that I loved..but that was in the old days..anyway, my point is that place really meant something special for me..although it's smaller than other places but I belonged there and there's no other places that I would rather be..

Lastly, whether real or imagined, true places are more important than ever in these times of great and sometimes in devastating changes. I wish for true places, real, imagined or simply remembered for all those who are suffering today. I've told you about the place I hold dear the most..What are some of your true places?

"It is not down in any map, true places are never are.." -Herman Melville

Dreams really do come true..

This time..Memories just came back and hunt me to the ground..lots and lots of memories..the sweet ones, the bad ones, and much more..Why? why now? I didn't ask for any of this..I just want to live forward to the future..not relieving my past..I gave that one up. But it had to return to me back and God knows why..maybe there's some 'Hikmah' inside it but who knows..today and yesterday was a day to remember for me as I visited places and met people that relived my memories back..but I didn't actually expected that I could became this 'Emo' just by seeing someone in the past..

Yesterday, I had a dream that I was with you again..we spent time together..we hold hands..we were so close to each other and we were in loved so badly that it hurts to just missing each other..I thought I was in heaven..I thought my wish really did come true..and I thought that this is it, I'm with you again..I felt peace in my heart after all this time of suffering knowing that you were gone..

In that dream, It felt like it was so real and so true..and I couldn't be more happier than before..I'm finally with the person that I truly loved and adored..But suddenly things happened that day..you were sick..and I was worried about you..thinking that you're gonna leave me alone forever..but you did..

You died in that dream..you left me alone in this world..and I didn't get a chance to say that I love You..

After I woke up..I realized that my dream really was real..becoz you're Dead to me..and you left me sitting here waiting for you to finally came back to me...........but yeah..It was only just a dream..

'Syawal' and what's more?

So I guess you all know that tomorrow's Raya! What plans have you made? Is it gonna be fun and exciting? I know mine is gonna be freaking Awesome! Can't wait for tomorrow..I'm gonna be putting my new purple Baju Melayu shirt with a black sampin just to make it look good..haha and I'm gonna visit all my cousins in Kuantan, Pahang and we're gonna eat eat eat and EAT, baby! wuhuuuu!

Owh I just wanna let u know that this time I'll be celebrating Aidilfitri as a single man and no girlfriend whatsoever..hehe It's kinda lonely I guess but I think I gotta get used to it though..who knows when I'll be falling in love again..I don't quite find the right person yet but never mind..Love's a bad ass bitch..it'll come to anyone that it wants and just like that the love drunk will come back to me again..but till' then..I just wanna enjoy my single time first..

It's not that I'm that lonely and all.. I mean I still got my [huhahuha] friends! My Hungry soldiers! Hahaha these guys are such good friends to me and It's a pleasure to be knowing them all this long..and most importantly right now, I still got my beloved and adorable Family!! Syukur kepada Tuhan kerana masih memberi ku peluang untuk sambut Raya bersama keluarga Tersayang! So yeah..I don't mind celebrating raya this year being single or whatever..

Finally, to all my dear friends out there, I wish u nothing but happiness for this Raya okay..have a good one and don't forget for the ones that's already gone from this world..let's pray for them and may God bless them..[Raya, raya jugak tapi jangan lupe dunia dan agame k] orait! Assalamualaikum~

Being the Voice of the voiceless..

It's about the people who didn't get a chance to live their dream or live their life the way that they plan it to be..becoz it has been stopped by the people who are much stronger than them..these people are called bullies or stupid people..

To be honest, I pity to those who had to go through this shit..I meant by being bullied..it isn't fair! I think that everyone deserves a chance to live their dreams..who knows whether it might bring a change to this dying world..and it might make it better than before..but NO..there had to be someone who's gonna stop them before they could do anything..that's just wrong.

Sometimes I always wonder..what is their problem anyway? They're always picking on the weaker ones and not thinking about their lives..that's just plain stupid, rude and selfish..someday, these bullies are gonna get theirs..I meant their punishment! someday, the people are gonna rise and make a stand to this mindless people and say 'Enough is Enough!'

I for once had been bullied before..whether it is through the mind or through the physical aspect..I've had it all and trust me..it ain't awesome at all..so that's why I'm so pissed with these bullies! They think that just becoz they're stronger and bigger or even smarter, they could take advantage on the unfortunate ones..

Yes, people that are kinda slow and not so quick in learning existed in this world..yes, people that couldn't live through their life without a helping hand existed and yes, people that really need others to help them achieve something really do existed..people like me for instance..

So what? It doesn't mean that the weaker ones had to be ignored or to be treated like dirt..it doesn't mean that we couldn't learn anything..and it doesn't mean that we couldn't be better than the already greater people? Think about it..all people deserve some greatness and happiness in their life..and sometimes, they need a helping hand in order to achieve or to pursue it..so we must help each other out! Not treat each other like trash! Gosh I hate you bullies!

Come to think of it, I got something to say to you bullies..whether you won't admit that you're a bully or whatever, just remember that our God is always fair to all of us..so what comes around, goes around..keep that in mind..you may have live well and happy right now, but in the end you're gonna feel just exactly the way the people you had bullied before..you're gonna feel the pain, miserableness, sorrow..all of this are gonna come to you..

So Don't think that you're so smart to avoid all of that..don't think that you're such an expert in life that you can plan an escape route through what's coming for you in the end and don't for a second think that you can judge people the way they are..becoz everyone has their own unique style..So go fuck yourself!

I am The Voice of The Voiceless and I am The Cult of Personality!

Something I've been thinking about..

To think about the past..I did some horrible things that I'm not proud of..for example, I hurted someone that I truly loved and left her for some stupid reason..that wass something that I regretted the most..gosh I wish I have her in my arms right now..but what can i do..i'm in no shape and have no rights in getting her back..i know that right now she's happy with her life and I'm glad and okay with that..even though i'm not involved in it..it's okay..

to think about the past..something just buggers my mind..something like letting someone down..someone that i used to love and hold dearly! but i let her down..damn i think this is the same thing that i've been thinking about since last year..what to do? what to do? i really want her back..but i can't do anything..i'm so weak and helpless..

to think about the past..there's one thing that's been stuck in my mind and that is not realizing that my true love is right in front of me at that time..how could i not realize it? am i that big of an ego? am i that dumb?..damn i'm so stupid..im sorry, girl..im so sorry..i wish i could go back time and change my own mistakes..i should've stayed with u and love u..only u..but it's too late and i have to accept facts right now..

lastly, to think about the present, i just want u to know that i'l always believe that someday..u and i are gonna be together again..i keep that faith in me for as long as i Live..So long..

Two people, two ways, two personalities..6 stabs.

Wassup fellas..I got a story here and I think that I wanna write it down on this blog just to share it with u guys..if u dont like it then leave me alone..Im not in the mood.

Once upon a time, there were two people which was a girl and a boy..both were from different places and were very far away from each other. One day, They met at a place where both of them quickly fell in love with each other and soon they've become lovers. At the moment they've been living in a fantasy world where nothing goes wrong at all. They are happy.

As years goes by, some complications had been happening between those two and soon they came to realize that this was not gonna work out perfectly so they split up and went on with their own lives. At the moment both of them are living in a Hell Hole where everything goes wrong and badly. They are suffering deeply..

Time went on as usual and the girl met a little boy. They had conversations from time to time and they've became great friends. The little boy adored this girl because of her passion in her life and her lovely eyes. What this girl dont know is that this little boy is a friend of the older boy which was her ex. At the moment the older boy is quite happy with his life being friends with this young boy and the girl is also quite happy having conversations with this young boy from time to time. They are living like normal person with normal activities in life.

One fucking day, the older boy has been receiving news that his friend, the young boy is having conversations with the girl which was his ex for a very long time and that put fire in his eyes. On that night, the older boy wanted to kill his own friend because he thought that the young boy wants to steal the girl away from him even though both of them had nothing goin' on anymore.

The older boy quitely make his way up to the young boy's room but he accidentally step on to something..which was making a sound that startled the young boy. He woke up in shock to see that the older boy is holding a sharp combat knife but he quickly react and prepare himself for battle with his own fucking friend. I guess that the young boy knew that this was coming but he never expected it would be this long for the older boy to know everything but that doesnt matter right now. All that is in his mind right now is to save his life which mean by killing his friend if necessary or trying to persuade him with something else..

The older boy said that the young boy has stolen the girls's heart away from him and that makes him mad..mad enough to even kill a friend. Without talking too long, both of them were at each other's fists already. They are fighting for their lives and surviving with every blows that they took from each other's attacks. One wrong move would be the end of one's life.

The fight didnt last too long because the young boy was obviously much stronger than the older boy. So he beat him and stab him 6 times in order to kill this older boy because he's quite a big person using the older boy's combat knife. The older boy died without saying a word.

That night..Young boy sat alone and thinks that did he just do the right thing..or the wrong thing..he told the girl about what happened and explain it everything so that the girl knows the truth about the older boy..

-The End-